I'm so full of pain and bitterness and I need some hope. - hate depression sadness

Post 262101 by ggp88 deleted for the following reason: Heya, I'm sorry you are dealing with all this, but this is unfortunately like you note pretty all-over-the-place and there's not really a concrete question here. Maybe rewrite a s more focused "this is what I'm asking for" sort of thing and repost next week? -- cortex